My Birthday Cake Moment

If it's true, as futurists predict, that the next great war will be an economic one, the US has already lost.

How do I know?

I've had my birthday cake moment.

In a crucial scene in Battle of the Bulge—one of my all-time favorite war movies—actor Robert Shaw, who plays a Nazi colonel, examines a birthday cake he's seized from an American POW.

He turns to his adjutant and says, "The enemy has the fuel and planes to fly cake over the Atlantic Ocean. Do you know what this means? Germany has already lost the war."

Last week, while waiting at the gate for a flight, I had my birthday cake moment.

It's important to note the flight number was 1175; the time of departure, 11:20.

A woman and her teenage daughter plopped down next to me.

The woman looked lost and confused. "Did we get here in time?" she snapped at the girl.

The teenager rolled her eyes, unfolded her boarding pass and scrutinized it.  "The plane doesn't leave until 1175," she insisted.

Seventeen years old... and she can't tell time.

Do you know what this means?

We have already lost the war.

The Last Word in Websites

Pinterest may end the reign of the word, changing the Web into a mammoth picture book.

So says marketing consultant Frank Reed, writing for Biznology.

Reed claims "we are rapidly moving toward the point where we are going to be communicating in flash cards of images—and words may be an unsettling extra, if needed at all."

Marketers may be forced to ditch copy for pictures, Reed says, for the simple reason that "everyone is doing it."

Google—because its engine indexes words—has spurred marketers to build copy-intensive Websites, in an effort to optimize searches.

But the age of copy-heavy Websites may be at an end, thanks to the surge in popularity of Pinterest.

Customers' preference for pictures poses a predicament for marketers, Reed asserts. 

They must move quickly "toward toward a dumbed down version of communication," or run the risk of driving Website visitors away.

"Is your business ready for its image to be represented in images?" Reed asks.

"Are you able to help the over-informed get to your point as quickly as possible through eye candy? If not, you may find yourself looking antiquated quicker than you could have ever imagined."

Social Media Groupies Should Face Up to Facts

All those overeager riders on the social media bandwagon are bozos on a bus, according to The Face-to-Face Book (forthcoming from Free Press).


Authors Ed Keller and Brad Fay argue that social media marketing simply represents another gold rush, as temporary and thoughtless as tulip mania.


And while credulous marketers go on a fool's errand, the authors contend, "the largest social gold mine is literally right beneath our noses."


They're referring, of course, to word-of-mouth conversations.


In the book, Keller and Fay present research showing that over 90 percent of "true interpersonal influence" results from face-to-face.


"Social media is big and growing, but it is still dwarfed by the analog world in which people live and interact," they write.


Marketers who place their bets on social media "to chase a dream" will wind up big losers.


The authors offer Pepsi as an example.


In early 2010, PepsiCo slashed its traditional media spend to place its bet on social media.


But the company's wager "did not come close to achieving the pay dirt it intended."


Twelve months later, Diet Coke surpassed Pepsi as the Number Two soft drink (Coke is Number One) and PepsiCo returned to spending big on traditional media.


PepsiCo bought the social media hype at its own expense.


"Pepsi does in fact sell soft drinks because of social interactions, but not necessarily because of online interactions," the authors write.  "In virtually every decision we make, every one of us is influenced by other people, mostly the people we spend time with in the 'real world.'"

Is Your Customer Experience Broken?

According to brand-builder Christine Mauro, "customer experience" is where it's at.

"Customer experience is about meeting customer needs, about choosing and using certain words, about aligning touch points, and about creating relationships," she says.

But marketers often overlook the three touch points with the biggest effect on those relationships, Mauro says.

Voice. Marketers speak inconsistently and use in-house or industry jargon customers don't grasp. "Establish a distinct voice that brings your brand to life, and stick with that voice," Mauro recommends. "Use clear language and jargon-free terminology. Explain details in simple terms that the customer can understand."

Language. Marketers frequently turn off customers by delivering a "fragmented customer experience." One department handles purchases, another rewards; one, payments, another refunds. Worse, they all use their own terminology. But customers think of you as one entity. All departments "should speak the same language, use the same terms, and create a seamless experience."

Fine print. Marketers often think a pretty Website is enough. But good customer experience stems from presenting information well, including fine print. "Consider every single word and graphic element, down to the tiny print of your Terms and Conditions copy," Mauro urges. Your "unheralded touch points such as bills, policies, and all the functional communications that customers interact with on a daily basis" have a huge impact on customer experience.

PR Flacks: Reap What You Social

PR flacks better watch out for hubris, warns Chris Abraham on Biznology.

Too often, they signal contempt to the the very bloggers they're pitching.

But bloggers have their number.

"Bloggers and other social media online influencers may not know who Edward Bernays is or have the lingua franca of a trained communications professional, but they sure can spot the eye roll of condescension and contempt from a mile away," Abraham writes.

Try as he might, the flack can't fool the blogger he secretly despises.

"If you think that bloggers are actually failed journalists, you may have contempt for your audience; if you consider the time spent by a blogger would be better spent "working," you may have contempt for your audience; if you believe what bloggers do is 'just prattle on,' you may have contempt for your audience; and if you actively play favorites and only engage with the crème de la crème of bloggers, you may have contempt for your audience."

Stifle your snobbery, if you hope to pitch bloggers successfully, Abraham advises. Start by reading How to Win Friends and Influence People.