Patriotism is the Refuge of Stooges

One of the saddest lessons of history is this: if we’ve been bamboozled long enough, we tend to reject any evidence of the bamboozle.

― Carl Sagan

Hundreds of gun-toting "patriots" arrived this weekend at Gettysburg, to protect the national military park's Confederate monuments from desecration by leftists.

Although the leftists never materialized, blood was shed. One patriot accidentally shot himself in the foot.

The perfect metaphor, if there ever were one.

Patriotism is the refuge of stooges.

My plea to patriots this July 4th: read a freakin' history book (preferably not one published in Texas).

You might try Apostles of Disunion.

Illustrating the "real history" of the Civil War, the book recounts how a group of state-appointed commissioners from the Deep South traveled the upper Confederacy in 1860 spreading the secessionists' message: Lincoln, they said, would emancipate the slaves, and plunge the South into a racial nightmare.

During the next five years, 620,000 Americans would die, to settle the emancipation question.

The "fake history" took root after Appomattox, when disgruntled Confederate veterans began retailing the myth of the "Lost Cause" at their yearly reunions.

The war, they said, was never about slavery: it was waged only to defend the antebellum South, a moonlit magnolia paradise peopled by happy hoedowning slaves and their affectionate white masters.

These same propagandists made sure to regulate the history textbooks used in every school, while their dutiful daughters would later make sure to hype movies like D.W. Griffith’s “Birth of a Nation,” David O. Selznick's “Gone with the Wind'” and Walt Disney’s “Song of the South.”

Either It Looks Like a Miracle or It's Stupid

My ad agency years taught me never to show clients work that, for all purposes, couldn't be released as is.

Showing anything less than finished work gives clients little to evaluate. And showing anything less destroys the magic.

So I was gratified to hear an actual magician, Teller, express this principle to the host of NPR's This American Life.

Teller describes how he labored for months to incorporate the legendary "floating ball routine" into Penn & Teller's show.

Teller worked alone at night on an empty stage in a darkened theater, week after week, testing move after move after move, to make the trick fresh. He tested different props; built a stage set; abandoned it, and built another.

Only when he'd perfected the routine did Teller show it to his partner.

"Why didn't you just show Penn something rough?" the host asks Teller. "Just something with the moves you'd been inventing?"

"No, no, no!" Teller insists. "That's the thing about magic. You can't look at a half-finished piece of magic and know whether it's good or not. It has to be perfect before you can evaluate whether it's good.

"Magic is a fantastically meticulous form. Magic is an on/off switch. Either it looks like a miracle or it's stupid."

Blaming the Weather

You can fool some of the people all the time, and all the people some of the time, but you can’t fool all of the people all of the time.

— Abraham Lincoln

Fyre Festival fooled a lot of people.

So do a lot of events.

But you can't fool all of the people all of the time.

Serial scammer Billy McFarland, who The New York Times called, "Gatsby run through an Instagram filter," when confronted with accusations of fraud, blamed Fyre Festival's epic failure on the weather.

“I cannot emphasize enough how sorry I am that we fell short of our goal," he said in a statement in May.

How hauntingly similar that sounds to the statements made by many association-show producers after their events fail to attract buyers.

"We're disappointed by the attendance, but the industry's facing a cyclical downturn."

"Yes, we're disappointed by the attendance, but terrorism has deterred many travelers."

"Sure, we're disappointed by the attendance, but everyone knows the US economy's soft."

"We're deeply disappointed by the attendance. The weather is to blame."

Truth be told, you may never be able to draw enough buyers to satisfy exhibitors.

But are you even trying?

• Do you assume (pray) attendees will just come?
• Do you depend on email to promote your event?
• Do you neglect to issue newsworthy product announcements before your event?
• Do you believe your primary job is to sell booths?
• Do you think of exhibitors as the "wallets" who underwrite your conference?

Too many association-show producers "working hard" with "producing results."

Producing results today means innovating. Do you:

• Add novelty and value to every aspect of your show, year after year?
• Respect the fact exhibitors need results—and help them?
• Organize your event to maximize exhibitors' face-time with prospects?
• Lead your industry by applying new marketing tactics and technologies?
• Copy concepts from industry-leading shows like CES and NAB Show?
• Know more than your attendees and exhibitors about your industry's path forward

Or, when attendance flags, do you—like the organizer of Fyre Festival—keep calm and blame the weather?

NOTE: Billy McFarland was arrested yesterday and charged with wire fraud.

Sales' Secret Weapon

There's a time to groom and a time to go for it.

If you only groom prospects by sending them emails and posting cute pictures on social media, you'll wind up the dateless wonder on prom night.

Sales' secret weapon isn't so secret.

It's not even a weapon.

It's your phone.

Selling is all about engaging prospects in conversation. Social media can do that, but only in a shallow way.

If your outbound marketing doesn't spur lots of inbound phone calls, then you're just marketing. You're not selling.

So if you want to sell, pick up the phone for at least an hour a day and dial. You won't reach many prospects, so leave voicemail messages. Here's mine:

Hi, this is Bob James… 202.641.5131. Hope your day’s going better than mine. Look, I need money to pay for my art classes every Saturday… so I’m hoping you’ll hire my ad agency. Bob and David James… at BobandDavidJames.com.

Rinse, repeat.

You might also follow every call with an email or LinkedIn connection request.

If you need more guidance, read Dan Pink's remarkable book, To Sell is Human.

It's up to you to build your own pipeline. To do so, you must set aside at least an hour a day for outbound prospecting on the phone. Build your brand in the other hours.

5 Reasons Your Content Stinks

Only 6% of B2B marketers say they're "sophisticated" content marketers, according to Content Marketing Institute.

The rest worry their content stinks.

Content can stink for 5 reasons, says Alicia Esposito of Content4Demand:

Your copy stinks. Is your copy clear, concise and captivating? Or foggy, flowery and forgettable? I often see content marketing misfires mostly attributable to poor writing. The substance is great; how it's conveyed, anything but.

Your design stinks. Is your content engaging? Or merely an eyesore? Don't underestimate the importance layout, colors and images have in lead generation.

Your promotion stinks. You can’t just hit "publish" and expect leads. "Content needs to be supported by a multi-channel promotional strategy that includes email, social, digital advertising and other tactics," Esposito says.

Your choice of channels stinks. You also have to pick the right channels to amplify your content. Maybe your target audience prefers LinkedIn over Twitter, or your industry's trade magazine over The Wall Street Journal. "It’s not just about promoting your content to as many people as possible," Esposito says, "it’s about promoting your content to the right people."

Your UX stinks. Is your content swiftly and easily navigated? Or do you often send audiences down a rabbit hole? Don't let things like misleading images, hidden calls to action, and broken links frustrate prospects.

Before you rip and replace your content, figure out why it stinks.

"There are a lot of factors that influence your content’s results," Esposito says, "and there are a few questions you can ask to ensure you’ve covered all your bases before you go back to the drawing board."