Short Words Win

George Orwell advised, "Never use a long word where a short one will do."

The results of a 2005 experiment by psychologist Daniel Oppenheimer suggest Orwell was onto something.

Oppenheimer showed that writers who use big words needlessly are judged by readers as less intelligent than writers who use short ones.

To conduct his study, the Princeton psychologist borrowed students' writing samples and doctored them.

First, he created "highly complex" versions by replacing every noun, verb and adjective with its longest synonym.

Next, he created "moderately complex" versions by replacing every third noun, verb and adjective with its longest synonym.

Oppenheimer then asked subjects to read the various writing samples and rate the intelligence of their authors.

Across the board, the original samples won out over the moderately and highly complex versions.

Oppenheimer concluded, "Contrary to prevailing wisdom, increasing the complexity of a text does not cause an essay’s author to seem more intelligent. In fact, the opposite appears to be true."

Tip #5 for the Business Writer

Keep Your Phrases Parallel
Part 5 of a 5-part series on writing well.


Parallelism adds clarity to your writing readers appreciate.


In a parallelism, you keep the structure of any series of related phrases consistent, repeating the same word forms (your nouns, verbs, adjectives, etc.) in the same order.

Parallelism can occur within a sentence or within a paragraph.

Here's an example (from Florida Coconuts) of a faulty parallelism within a sentence:

Coconut water is fat free, delicious, and a great way to rehydrate after strenuous physical activity.

To make her structure parallel, the writer should say:

Coconut water is fat free, delicious and refreshing. It provides a great way to rehydrate after strenuous physical activity.

Here's an example (from Sony) of a faulty parallelism within a paragraph:

The installation of 600 Sony SNC-DH140T cameras was decided upon for three main reasons. The first was Sony’s outstanding image quality, both at day and night, in any season, and under any light conditions. The second related to backlighting: cameras in an airport terminal have to offer good image quality of the traffic inside as well as the people outside. The third criterion focused on the necessary integration with ADP’s existing Genetec software. Sony delivered seamless compatibility here: as soon as a Sony camera is installed on the ADP network, the Genetec software can add it automatically, without human intervention.

To make his structure parallel, the writer should say:

The installation of 600 Sony SNC-DH140T cameras was decided upon for three main reasons. The first was Sony’s outstanding image quality: images are clear both at day and night, in any season, and under any light conditions. The second was Sony's exceptional backlighting capability: cameras in an airport terminal have to offer good image quality of the traffic inside as well as outside. The third was Sony's seamless compatibility with ADP’s Genetec software: as soon as a Sony camera is installed on the ADP network, the Genetec software can add it automatically, without human intervention.

Tip #4 for the Business Writer

Avoid Imprecise Pronouns
Part 4 of a 5-part series on writing well.


If clarity is the aim of your prose, you miss the mark when you use imprecise pronouns. In particular, this and that.


These pronouns work only when clearly tied to a previous reference.


If used otherwise, they destroy clarity.


Here's an example (from Winterthur Technology Group) of an imprecise pronoun:


For the Winterthur group, the term "engineering" covers the complete consulting, support and training program. This helps customers to optimize the quality and efficiency of their grinding processes and achieve added value.

The pronoun this always refers to one thing. 

So, Winterthur, exactly what helps customers? Is it the term "engineering?" Consulting? Support? Or the training program?

The writer might have achieved clarity by saying:

For the Winterthur group, "engineering" means three things: consulting, support and training. Our three-pronged approach helps customers to optimize the quality and efficiency of their grinding processes and achieve added value.

Or the writer might say:

"Engineering" at Winterthur encompasses consulting, support and training, so you can optimize your grinding processes and get added value.

Tip #3 for the Business Writer

Subordinate conjunctions: handle with care

Part 3 of a 5-part series on writing well.

If you botch your use of subordinate conjunctions, you might be understood by readers. But you won't get any medals for logic.

Subordinate conjunctions are the glue that binds the independent and dependent parts of your sentences.

Subordinate conjunctions—handy words like after, because, however, until, where, whether and why—depict vital parts of reality, such as cause, sequence, timing and location.

Careless writers use subordinate conjunctions in ways that defy reason.

Here's an example (from Mobile Deals):

Tiny smartphones are selling like hot cakes these days, and HTC Wildfire S is clearly the proof of this statement, however one company who was trying too hard to prove this point is now no longer between us.

The sentence is illogical. The writer wants to tell readers:

• Sales of Wildfire S prove the high demand for tiny smartphones.
• In spite of the demand, one manufacturer of tiny smartphones has failed.

He should say:

As the HTC Wildfire S proves, tiny smartphones are selling like hot cakes, although one company that tried hard to prove the point is no longer with us.

A better alternative might be:

Sales of HTC Wildfire S prove the popularity of tiny smartphones, although one company that tried to milk the demand has failed.

Here's another example (from Smucker's) of the faulty use of a subordinate conjunction:

Moms and dads work hard to make sure their kids have a great start each day, but time and organizational challenges can make mornings stressful. Whether rushed or relaxed, the makers of Smucker's Snack'n Waffles brand waffles want to hear about your morning routine.

The writer's real aim is to say: 

• Morning routines are stressful for dutiful parents.
• Smucker's wants to learn whether yours is rushed or relaxed.

But she puts the dependent part of her second sentence in the wrong place. She should say:

Moms and dads work hard to make sure their kids have a great start each day, but time and organizational challenges can make mornings stressful. The makers of Smucker's Snack'n Waffles brand waffles want to hear whether your morning routine is rushed or relaxed.

Tip #2 for the Business Writer

Choose the right modifiers

Part 2 of a 5-part series on writing well.


Modifiers—the words that qualify nouns and verbs—can make or break your writing.


Like concrete nouns, modifiers can add precision your readers will appreciate.


But modifiers are tricky.


Use the right modifiers and your writing lifts off (think The Right Stuff).


Use the wrong modifers... use weak ones... use too many... or use clichés... and your writing fizzles.


As a rule, it's wise to omit modifiers, unless they add mojo to the nouns and verbs they qualify.


Here's an example (from Apple) of mangling your modifiers:


Sometimes life takes you by surprise. You’re reading a best seller on your iPad waiting for the morning train when you spy a gifted performer on the platform. Or you’re browsing the web on the couch when your dog trots by wearing your daughter’s tutu. The iSight camera on the new iPad lets you capture all these unpredictable, beautiful, and hilarious moments.


Does morning fortify the noun train? Only if the writer wanted us to think, "I can use my iPad while I commute."


Does iSight fortify camera? Positively.


Does new fortify iPad? Sure. No argument there.


Does gifted fortify performer? Nope. It's a cliché.


Do unpredictable, beautiful, and hilarious fortify moments? No. Once again, they're clichés.


How might the writer have better said this by omitting the modifiers?


Sometimes life takes you by surprise. You’re reading a best seller on your iPad waiting for the train when you spy a performer on the platform. Or you’re browsing the web on the couch when your dog trots by wearing your daughter’s tutu. The iSight camera on the new iPad lets you capture those moments.

Self-Inflicted Wounds

A military judge would argue that, in battle, there are no "accidental" self-inflicted wounds.

But I've discovered one in the war for attention.

It's an article offering Tips on Becoming a Good Writer that begins as follows:

"As the saying goes, the pen is sharper than the sword. A good writer is able to influence their readers into their train of thought; he or she is able to encourage and motivate the reader, gain their trust, and make the readers practice what they learnt from them. What it means to you that, whether you are aspiring to be a author of a bestselling novel or you are a marketer representing your company products and brand, being good in writing can put you in many advantages."

Chinese proverb: If your words are worthless, don't give advice.

PR Flacks: Reap What You Social

PR flacks better watch out for hubris, warns Chris Abraham on Biznology.

Too often, they signal contempt to the the very bloggers they're pitching.

But bloggers have their number.

"Bloggers and other social media online influencers may not know who Edward Bernays is or have the lingua franca of a trained communications professional, but they sure can spot the eye roll of condescension and contempt from a mile away," Abraham writes.

Try as he might, the flack can't fool the blogger he secretly despises.

"If you think that bloggers are actually failed journalists, you may have contempt for your audience; if you consider the time spent by a blogger would be better spent "working," you may have contempt for your audience; if you believe what bloggers do is 'just prattle on,' you may have contempt for your audience; and if you actively play favorites and only engage with the crème de la crème of bloggers, you may have contempt for your audience."

Stifle your snobbery, if you hope to pitch bloggers successfully, Abraham advises. Start by reading How to Win Friends and Influence People.

The Secret to Better Blogging

Many social media experts insist that you cannot succeed at blogging without a content plan.


They argue that, without one, you'll procrastinate... or you'll fizzle out.... or you'll stray from your goals, producing off-target posts that fail to earn you followers.


I'm not so sure they're right.


Sure and steady output—even without a plan to back it up—may be just the thing for you.


In fact, a content plan may be the last thing in the world you need.


If planning your blog's content seems foreign, you might be the kind of writer economist David Galenson calls a "seeker."


Seekers, Galenson says, share "persistent uncertainty about their methods and goals."


And that uncertainty leads them to be dissatisfied with their output.


"Their dissatisfaction impels them to experiment, and their uncertainty means that they change their work by trial and error, moving tentatively toward their imperfectly perceived objectives."

One example of such a writer is the novelist Virginia Woolf.

Describing her production of Mrs. Dalloway, Woolf wrote, "the idea started as the oyster starts or the snail to secrete a house for itself. And this it did without any conscious direction. The little note book in which an attempt was made to forecast a plan was soon abandoned, and the book grew day by day, week by week, without any plan at all, except that which was dictated each morning in the act of writing."


How about you?

Are you a planner?

Or a seeker?

How to Write a Blog Post that Will Attract 10,000 Followers

During a recent conference, a social media expert told me, "Writing super-sticky blog posts is so easy, a chimp could do it."

So I sought out accomplished blogger and social media maven Joe Young and asked him to share his secrets.

Here's what he said in answer to my question, "How do you write a blog post that will attract 10,000 followers?"

BOB: Joe, first off, how do you get started?

JOE: Never begin with an idea or point of view. Those things are for sissies. If you want to write a blog post that ranks well and draws visitors to your site, start by using Google's keyword tool to find "Low Competition" keywords. Once you find enough of them, string the keywords together in sentences. Of course, I'm exaggerating when I say "sentences," because sentences typically have a point.

BOB: What's the next step?

JOE: Now that you have all the keywords stuffed into "sentences," you need to chop your achievement into bite-size pieces, so visitors don't choke. That's where section headers come in handy. The more, the better.

BOB: Any finishing touches you recommend?

JOE: After you have compiled your content, sliced and diced it, and added headers, be sure to go back and insert a lot of obvious grammatical mistakes and punctuation errors. You don't want visitors to think you're a snob. Gotta be authentic.

BOB: I understand graphics are important, too.

JOE: Absolutely! Most people are now using mobile apps to read blog posts. An image will lure them in. Videos work well, too. But a word of warning about them. If you use videos in your blog, be careful to keep them super-low quality. Followers hate "slick." Again, gotta be authentic.   

BOB: Is there anything else to writing a blog post that attracts 10,000 followers?

JOE: Nope.

BOB: Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle.