My mom and dad said, if I write you a letter, you'd bring me all the things I want this Christmas.
So here goes.
Transformers. Bring me as many of these as you can, Santa. Sometimes I run out of ways to transform dull first drafts into inspiring copy.
Stinky the Garbage Truck. I can use this to haul off the ideas I come up with that my clients reject.
Spy Net Video Watch. I can use this super-special watch to keep tabs on competitors. But, more importantly, I can use it to show up on time for appointments.
High School Musical 3 Game. I want to relive high school this way. My actual high school was more like the Revenge of the Nerds 3 Game.
Speedster Fire Truck. I need this to rescue the numerous clients I have who are too busy to notice their hair is on fire.
Thank you, Santa.
If you bring me all these things, I promise, promise, promise to be good.
Truth be told, the anti-social organization holds this motto dearly. No matter what it spouts on Facebook, Twitter or YouTube.
"The customers are just suckers. Let's never, ever give 'em a break."
On Social Media Today, guest columnist Alexis Karlin takes anti-social organizations, deservedly, to task.
She's a tad more generous in attitude than I.
Forget what the social media gurus advise, Karlin writes. "Organizations need to start by indoctrinating every employee with a customer support mentality before they even begin to think about social anything."
She offers her own example of anti-social corporate behavior.
Recently, Karlin cancelled a license for software she'd been using.
Two months later, she received an email from the vendor. It claimed Karlin was four payments in arrears.
Karlin shot back an email. Why hadn't she been notified earlier?
The vendor's reply: "someone else" in her firm had been notified.
But Karlin's was the only name ever given to the vendor. She then asked to see copies of the late-payment notices.
There has been no response.
Karlin feels anger over the incident. "Even though we spend all this time talking about engaging, energizing, supporting, and embracing," she writes, "I strongly feel that companies are forgetting to do this in the day-to-day dealings through email, over the phone and face to face.
"My guess is that this vendor has a great social strategy and plan in place, but didn’t bother to instill the prerequisite customer service mentality."
My guess is slightly different.
Yes, this vendor has a great social strategy and plan in place. But it doesn't have a lot of scruples.
Engage. Energize. Embrace. And never give a sucker an even break.
