Breathing Together

Everyone loves a conspiracy.

― Dan Brown

While not every Trumpster insists Barack Obama is a Muslim or Hilary Clinton a cannibal, every Trumpster demands we acknowledge the "deep state."

You cannot find one that doesn't.

Conspiracy-thinking is the Trumpster's oxygen.

But after spending 40 years in Washington, and watching close up a succession of nine administrations—Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton, George W., Obama and Trump—I can assure you there is no deep state.

There are only deep pockets—the ones rattled by fat-cat donors of every stripe. Their goal is not world dominion, but control over the various industries that produce their massive wealth.

But Trumpsters must have their deep-state conspiracy, that octopean treachery they long to "unmask."

Conspiracy (meaning "plot") entered English in the 14th century from the Latin conspiratio, noun-form of the verb conspirare, meaning—literally—"to breathe together."

So you could say Trumpsters' romance with conspiracies is a deep fondness for breathing together.

They demonstrate that love at every maskless rally the president holds.

If there's a conspiracy afoot, it's theirs: the confederacy of dunces.

Commander in Cheap

The cheaper the crook, the gaudier the patter.

― Dashiell Hammett

As The New York Times reports, Donald Trump has been cashing in.

Sixty lobbyists, corporate men and foreign agents have put over $12 million in  Trump's pockets by buying memberships and booking events at his properties.

Trump has responded in kind, granting favors that can only be fulfilled by a sitting president.

If you pay Trump $250 thousand for a Mar-a-Lago membership, according to the Times, you get to meet him and ask a favor. It's likely he'll respond by summoning one of his stooges and directing them to take care of you.

Vice versa, if you see him outside the golf club and mention you want a favor, Trump will point out you'd better reup your Mar-a-Lago membership pronto.

Trump has proven he doesn't want to govern, only rob the Treasury.

But a penny-ante $12 million?

Trump claims he's worth billions but, instead of combating Covid-19 or joblessness, he spends his time making phone calls to dun members. 

What a cheap crook.

"He's corrupting the presidency for peanuts," writes Daily Kos. 

"The world at his fingertips, the man spends most of his time obsessing over how he can use the presidency to boost golf club memberships."

How Can They Believe This Crap? Episode IV

Fourth in a series wondering why Trump still has adherents

In Episode I, I suggested Trump's supporters have been brainwashed by their betters; in Episode II, that they simply find him entertaining; and in Episode III, that they sympathize with him.

A fourth theory occurs to me: Trump's supporters don't believe his crap. They merely tolerate it.

What they believe are the century-old tenets of the GOP: low taxes, corporatism, and a strong state.

Trump's just a useful idiot.

How Can They Believe This Crap? Episode III

Third in a series wondering why Trump still has adherents

In Episode I, I suggested Trump's supporters have been brainwashed by their betters; in Episode II, that they simply find him entertaining.

One more theory occurs to me: Trump's supporters—though themselves victimized—think he's the victim.

Blame it on sympathy, the emotion Adam Smith described as the part of our imagination that lets us picture what others feel.

Sympathy elevates our humanity, Smith says—and as every fundraiser knows. It allows us to feel for sick children, frightened refugees, and abandoned pets.

But it has its downside, the philosopher says, giving rise to irrational beliefs.

We sympathize with the dead, for example, imagining how miserable we'd be, were we dead. This "illusion of the imagination" gives rise to our belief in an afterlife.

We make a similar mistake, Smith says, when we imagine the "rich and powerful."

We imagine their perfectly happy lives, and relish that imaginary happiness so strongly we come to believe the rich and powerful deserve their wealth and privilege. So we grieve for "every injury that is done them." 

We could care less about the plight of the poor and powerless; thinking about them provides no vicarious joy.

The rich and powerful, however, aren't perfectly happy, Smith says; in fact, they're often miserable, cunning and vicious. 

But they know how to exploit our sympathy—our illusions about them—by continually claiming victimhood.

Sympathy deludes us, Smith says—and leads us to love our oppressors.

Sympathy: that's how Trump's fans can still believe his crap.

Don't miss Episode IV

How Can They Believe This Crap? Episode II

Second in a series wondering why Trump still has adherents

In Episode I, I suggested Trump's supporters have been brainwashed by their betters.

But another theory occurs to me: Trump's supporters think he's funny.

With the cancellation of The Apprentice, the Reality TV star has taken on a new role—that of the clownish "know nothing" Sergeant Shultz, the laugh-a-minute prison guard in CBS-TV's Hogan's Heroes.

Harold Livera, a high-school classmate of mine, once told me a story about his dad, who'd been a POW in a German stalag during WWII.

It seems the guards in the prison camp amused themselves one morning by knocking Harold's dad to the ground and kicking him in the stomach repeatedly. 

The beating caused such damage to his body that Harold's dad still suffered from his injuries in 1967.

Harold's dad was outraged that Hogan's Heroes was on the air. By turning a blind eye to Nazism, fans of the show gave permission to CBS to turn atrocity into comedy.

Trump gives his fans that same permission. His antics distract them from evil.

While his henchmen perpetrate crimes that result in thefts of the Treasury, destruction of the environment, the imprisonment of children, and the deaths of 400,000 Americans, his followers forgive Trump—because he's hilarious.

Trump can act with impunity because he's so freakin' funny.

What's the matter? You're not laughing?

NOTE: If you notice a physical resemblance between Shultz and Trump, just tell yourself, "I see nothing. Nothing!"

Don't miss Episode III.